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Here’s the top weedy and drug-related news for August 14, 2023 at the MERRY JANE News Roundup.

Dwyane Wade Announces a New Weed Product During His NBA Hall of Fame Induction 

The most successful pro athletes always got some side hustles alongside their sport of choice. But retired Miami Heat baller Dwyane Wade brought some extra-hot fire to his own NBA Hall of Fame induction on August 12. 

While making his acceptance speech, Wade dropped his new Jeeter box product, which holds three infused joints called Jeeter Baby Cannons. Of course, the box set is called “Hall of Fame,” and it will be available in the legal markets of California, Arizona, and Michigan at about $80 a pop. That comes out to about $27 per joint, so those things better clap harder than two sumo wrestlers scissoring.


Celebrities Keep Pushing (Supposedly) Brain-Enhancing Nootropics

What do actor Gillian Anderson, supermodel Bella Hadid, Joe Jonas, Kourtney Kardashian, and Blink-182’s Travis Barker all have in common? They’re all slingin’ nootropics, which are consumables that allegedly enhance cognitive function. They come in a variety of forms, from fizzy water to pills. 

Anderson probably has the most colorfully named brand, called G-Spot (because of her first name, ya perv). 

The other celebs have some catchy brand names, too. For instance, Bella Hadid is rockin’ Kin Euphorics drinkables, while Jonas and Barker are hocking Mindright. Mindright can be slipped into a coffee or bought as a poppy crunchy.

The real question is: Does any of this stuff work? There’s no one formula for anything sold as a nootropic, which often contains a variety of herbs with caffeine. Sure, you could buy the celebrity-branded nootropic cheesy poofs, or you could buy a few bottles of the herbs in question, pop those with your morning coffee, and probably call it good.

According to pediatrician Dan Brennan, MD, most of the effects of store-bought or over-the-counter nootropics is likely a good ol’ case of placebo. “The circuits that are involved in human cognition are very complicated and not fully understood,” he wrote for WebMD. “You can’t just ‘turn up the dial’ that easily.”

A Mercenary Magazine Is Still Stuck on This Biden White House Cocaine Thing

Soldier of Fortune Magazine is trying ridiculously hard to tie the Biden family to a baggie of coke found at the White House last month. 

“It was someone within the Biden family orbit, and it wasn’t Hunter,” one anonymous source allegedly told Soldier of Fortune, as reported by the New York Post. The magazine’s publisher also claimed to have reached out to President Biden by text directly, only to have her texts not delivered after asking about the cocaine. 

This level of virtue signaling is hilarious, coming from a magazine that once offered murder-for-hire services through its classified section