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Wax Sculptures That Look Nothing Like the Celebrities They Are Supposed to Be

CULTURE
 Claire Downs
Nov 19, 2016
Wax Sculptures That Look Nothing Like the Celebrities They Are Supposed to Be
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They’re famously bad.

Now that we have a professional wax sculpture as our president-elect, we thought it might be fun to take a look at some of 2016’s most blameless beings: wax sculptures of public figures created for “entertainment” purposes. Sure, wax sculptures did not create the political mess we’ve found ourselves in, but their blank stares and meaningless existence embodies the nihilism we feel.

Madame Tussaud’s adds 230 sculptures each year to its “museums” across the globe. There are other notable purveyors of wax likenesses, including the Hollywood Wax Museum and the Musée Grévin, which each feature four locations worldwide.

One of only reasons to buy a ticket to a wax museum is to scrutinize the body types of your favorite actors and musicians. Apparently, it takes a team of 15 artists three to four months to complete one. The subject who will undergo this waxing process must sit for over 250 different measurements and color matching tests. I’m almost positive that the Hollywood Wax Museum doesn’t take this kind of care, though.

Thus, when the sculptor misses the mark, the result is a hollow-souled and slightly off-brand version of your favorite star that is devastating to look upon for visitors. Especially considering that a one-day pass to Madame Tussaud’s is $82. The more you stare at them, the crazier they look.


 Claire Downs
Claire Downs

Claire Downs is a writer and comedian based out of Los Angeles. She's written for Nickelodeon, VH1, Funny or Die, and Hello Giggles. You can follow her on Twitter @clairecdowns. She prefers Indica to Sativa, in case you're wondering.



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Wax Sculptures That Look Nothing Like the Celebrities They Are Supposed to Be

CULTURE
 Claire Downs
Nov 19, 2016
Share this article!
Wax Sculptures That Look Nothing Like the Celebrities They Are Supposed to Be

They’re famously bad.

Now that we have a professional wax sculpture as our president-elect, we thought it might be fun to take a look at some of 2016’s most blameless beings: wax sculptures of public figures created for “entertainment” purposes. Sure, wax sculptures did not create the political mess we’ve found ourselves in, but their blank stares and meaningless existence embodies the nihilism we feel.

Madame Tussaud’s adds 230 sculptures each year to its “museums” across the globe. There are other notable purveyors of wax likenesses, including the Hollywood Wax Museum and the Musée Grévin, which each feature four locations worldwide.

One of only reasons to buy a ticket to a wax museum is to scrutinize the body types of your favorite actors and musicians. Apparently, it takes a team of 15 artists three to four months to complete one. The subject who will undergo this waxing process must sit for over 250 different measurements and color matching tests. I’m almost positive that the Hollywood Wax Museum doesn’t take this kind of care, though.

Thus, when the sculptor misses the mark, the result is a hollow-souled and slightly off-brand version of your favorite star that is devastating to look upon for visitors. Especially considering that a one-day pass to Madame Tussaud’s is $82. The more you stare at them, the crazier they look.


 Claire Downs
Claire Downs

Claire Downs is a writer and comedian based out of Los Angeles. She's written for Nickelodeon, VH1, Funny or Die, and Hello Giggles. You can follow her on Twitter @clairecdowns. She prefers Indica to Sativa, in case you're wondering.



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