Yuck it up, Johnny Law.
As pot smokers around the world light up and party in the name of all things ganja, police departments around the country are celebrating 4/20 with post after post of sickeningly corny pot jokes… all backed up by the looming threat of arrest.
In Southern Pines, North Carolina, the local police department staged a photo opp in a station holding cell showing an expertly-displayed snack offering, stoked with potato chips, Oreos, and juice. In the caption, the department's social media manager noted that they were anticipating "additional guests visiting our detention facility on the 4/20 holiday."
Ah yes, locking people behind bars for possessing a plant… good one, officers!
Across the Lone Star State in Mineral Wells, Texas, local cops used a 4/20 Facebook post to warn of increased roadway safety monitoring, but couldn't resist the urge to add a few quick quips about just how much stoners love snack food.
"Driving under the influence of marijuana is just as dangerous as driving while intoxicated, and just as illegal," Mineral Wells PD wrote on Facebook. "So pick up your Taco Bell or stock up on munchies before so the only thing you're wrecking is a bag of Doritos."
Get it? Munchies!
According to Governing Magazine, police officers see the 4/20 social media posts as a way to relate to their constituents, and "humanize" themselves, no matter how many eyes are rolling at their stoner cliche references.
"Part of what we're trying to do is humanize law enforcement a little bit," Wyoming, Minnesota Police Chief Paul Hoppe told Governing. "When we take the tone of an institution, it makes it difficult to resonate with individuals."
For their part of the fun, the Wyoming, MN police department staged a photo of snacks and video games set as bait, with an officer waiting in the wings to capture any unsuspecting stoner who couldn't resist the White Castle trap.
Oh, you mean the joke still ends in the capture and arrest of cannabis users? Yeah, we're still not laughing.
For more fourth grade stoner comedy, pull up your local police department's social media pages and start scrolling. And for an optimal 4/20 experience, please avoid law enforcement officers at all costs; they're better at joking on the internet than they are in person — we promise.
Follow Zach Harris on Twitter