Lead photo via Briteside
If there’s one thing America’s multi-billion dollar pharmaceutical industry is good at, it’s making their deadly products seem harmless. After all, nothing says addictive sleeping pills like a heart-shaped box full of puppies, right? But if you watch more closely, you’ve probably noticed that the calm woman with her sarong flowing in the breeze is not actually experiencing the drowsiness, diarrhea, headaches, nausea, or even possibly fatal side effects that the fast-talking narrator is describing.
Thankfully in over half of the country, Americans now have access to medical or recreational cannabis, significantly decreasing the need for prescription pills introduced to the public on late night TV. While even the federal government is already starting to admit that weed is a viable alternative for some conventional medications, one canna-company is using the pharmaceutical industry’s famed advertising techniques to clown these harbingers of addiction and recommend an all-natural substitute.
From a children’s soccer game to financial stresses to gazing longingly out the window, Briteside knows that everyday life can be tough, and adding marijuana to the mix can help bring some much needed enjoyment, right down to the ad’s list of side effects which include “uncontrollable giggles” and “elevated sensitivity to musical dopeness.”
Not forgetting the speed-reading nonsense that most pharmaceutical spot rely upon, Briteside’s matronly voice-over adds “tetrahydrocannabinol may also induce feelings of existential well-being and relentless optimism.”
Halfway through the hilarious online-only ad (due to the legal restrictions of broadcast television), the narrator makes sure to reassure watchers that the company is indeed a real legal weed company, right before the commercial’s two main actors devolve into a momentary burst of blatantly stoned musical ineptness.
So next time you’re up late watching Comedy Central and see an ad for painkillers, boner pills, or sleep aids, hit up your dealer instead of your doctor — weed just might be the medicine you need to feel like that blissed out mom in the commercials.