It's the holidays, and for many, that means taking a well-deserved break from work and spending quality time with the fam. But the season can also bring on a whole new wave of stress: Last-minute gift shopping, arguments with your pro-Trump grandparents, screaming children, you name it. Of course, lighting up a joint is a great way to peace out and reduce your stress and anxiety, but can you get your chill on without letting your whole extended family know that you're high?
The answer is yes. MERRY JANE has trawled the depths of our cannabis-enhanced minds (and the internet) to bring you a list of the most discreet methods of kush consumption. There are numerous alternatives to smoking available, but even if you're snowed in with nothing but that joint your brother rolled, there are several brilliant ways to disguise the pungent (but lovely) aroma of cannabis. Follow these simple tips to bring some peace to your holiday, on the DL.
Full transcript below:
For many, the holidays mean spending time with your family, exchanging gifts, taking a well-deserved break from work, and chilling around the fire. But the holidays can also bring extreme stress – like screaming children, drunk uncles, desperate last-minute holiday shopping, introducing your new life partner to your parents...the list goes on and on.
Stepping away for a moment and having a quick puff is a great way to relieve stress and get you back in the holiday spirit. But are you worried that the dank stank of your high-octane stash is going to tip off your whole family and cause a blowup during Christmas dinner?
One of the simplest ways to smoke up on the downlow is to take a hike and find a private place to get your chill on in peace. But if that's not an option, don't worry, there are many ways to discreetly get blazed without alerting the whole family.
There are numerous cannabis products on the market today that do not require setting a plant on fire to get you high. Edibles, oils, tinctures, and transdermal patches can all get you where you want to be without stinking up the house. Vape pens are another great choice, as they provide a discreet way to sneak a single puff without creating obvious smoke or heavy odors.
But even if you're stuck indoors with nothing but that joint your cousin rolled, you've still got options.
Try to find the best ventilated area to smoke in so that the smoke has a chance to escape.
An air purifier or ionizer can also absorb smoke from a room as well as neutralize the odor. Additionally, there are several different commercial sprays on the market that can help neutralize offending odors.
Anyone who smoked weed as a teenager will remember the classic doob tube, AKA the sploof. For those that don't know already, just take a paper towel or toilet paper roll and attach a dryer sheet over one side, then exhale the smoke through the tube.
Even if you've managed to keep the smell of weed out of your grandparents' garage, remember that the scent can still linger on your hair, clothes, and hands. A shower and a change of clothing is your best bet to remove all traces of odor, but if you don't have the time, you can use essential oils, perfume or body spray to mask the scent. Also, if you can go outside, UV rays will neutralize odors.
Also keep in mind that even before you burn it, that extra-dank sticky icky you brought with you still might be pungent enough to attract unwelcome interest. To avoid this, you can store your herb in an airtight, smell-proof container. There are dozens of containers on the market that are specifically designed to keep your stash safe and undetected, but in a pinch, you can use a glass canning jar with an air-tight seal or a smell-proof zip-lock bag.
Keep all of these tips in mind, and you can breeze through the holidays and leave your worries behind. Happy holi-daze!